Best Laid Plans…


I sat sullenly on my garden bench in my ridiculously skimpy shorts and t-shirt, wondering if it was Friday 13th.  Nope, pretty sure it`s Monday.  Bob` s “I don`t like Mondays” suddenly tried to push it`s way into my foggy brain……

With just a handful of days left before July arrives, Crete`s Weather God, suddenly remembering he should have turned up the thermometre to heatwave level, decided that today was the day. Droning cicades and sweaty bedsheets forced me to rise way before my normal “crawl out of bed” time.  Understanding we were in for a scorcher, I immediately closed all the windows and went outside to push the shutters closed, thus mimilizing the heat exposure to the interior of the house.  The sick realization stopped me dead in my tracks.  As I had exited, I had very carefully pulled the door closed to keep that nasty heat out, with no key in the door to get back in.   What!!!??  where???? why???? Where the hell are my keys???

Going immediately to our hidey spot for the spare house key, I was mortified to see the hook hanging empty!  Eeeeeeeek!    Now what? Rushing to our two previous hidey spots, no joy – I began to get worried.  I wondered how I would manage all day outside till Vags returned from work.  My silly shorts and t-shirt made it very obvious that I couldn`t go and ask for help from anybody, for fear of frightening any small children.  A ridiculous notion anyway, as we have no neighbours. 

Stalking around the house and checking all possible weak entry points, momentarily, I considered my second ridiculous notion of the day – could my ample backend get through that tiny, teeny bathroom window?  No!  Way too many horribly humiliating consequences flashed before my eyes.

I returned to the offending hook to check it once more, questioning my very faculties.  Sweeping the accumulation of leaves on the floor to one side, my world took on meaning once more, there was the spare.    

Whilst Vags is remarkably good at forgetting to take his teeth with him any time we go out – picking up other people`s keys – he`s got off to a tee.